Funions Follies

Sunday Quotes

2009-07-19T11:57:00.001-05:00

"The good thing about puppy puke is that it's not as poopy as puppy poop when you clean it up."

And ...

"You are not hungry. You just PUKED!"

And ...

"He has a fake hip? Really?"

Fountains

2009-07-18T13:51:00.004-05:00

Very impressed with the new-look Washington Park. The old fountain wasn't user-friendly and it basically took up a big part of the park.

Blues Fest started last night and the park has a much more open feel to it now.

Click here for more.

Quincy needs to keep using the park for all kinds of events. The next improvement should be putting a stage on the south-side gazebo.

Blues Fest Tonight

2009-07-17T07:39:00.002-05:00

Here's the lineup for the Blues Fest in Washington Park tonight and Saturday. Hope to see you down there and be safe!

Friday, July 17

5 p.m. — The Beat Daddys, www.beatdaddys.com

7 p.m. — Ben Bumbry & The Messengers

9 p.m. — Eric Sardinas, www.ericsardinas.com

Saturday, July 18

1 p.m. — Rich Berry, www.myspace.com/richberryblues

3 p.m. — Matt Morrell & BluesHandle, www.twonotes.net/blueshandle/index.htm

5 p.m. — Pike Station, www.myspace.com/pikestation

7 p.m. — Scottie Miller & the ReUptake Inhibitors, www.scottiemiller.com

9 p.m. Albert Castiglia, www.albertcastiglia.com

Quote of the day

2009-07-16T06:53:00.002-05:00

"Say .... you wouldn't happen to know who chewed off the end of my guitar case, would ya?"

Calm in Springfield

2009-07-13T08:13:00.002-05:00

Worked for Gus in Springfield and things went very well. Muggy Saturday, but Sunday's weather was awesome, 70s with cloud cover. That probably was a big reason we had no major incidents or issues, just the usual problems with Gus Busters not showing up.

Excellent story by Dave Kane of the Springfield Journal-Register here.

A good Gus Macker tournament depends on how well it is organized from a local level. I'd say Springfield does a decent job, but I wish they could get a little bit better help. Still .... it all worked out. And the site is second to none, around the Horace Mann building a block from the old capitol building. I wandered around Saturday night and was very impressed with the plaques and explanation of the Lincoln history.

Dream Court with the Special Olympics players Saturday morning was awesome. Where else is your Gus Buster a former professional wrestler? Dave (Jackie Saszrak) Conrad, his son Dakota, Troy and all the gang had a blast.

The day after working for Gus usually means recovering from the truck that ran over you, and this morning is no exception .... except that I'm recovering by sitting on the back porch on another perfect summer morning.

Less Is More

2009-07-10T13:37:00.002-05:00

Had a blast last night playing a private party with Rock A. Bye near LaGrange, Mo., at a beautiful lodge on a lake.

It was for a wedding rehearsal party. We lugged over a P.A. and set up inside, but everybody decided to sit outside by the lake as the evening wore on, so we simply unplugged and took our guitars sans sound system to the party, and hooted and hollered as a full moon rose and the guests got merrier and merrier.

The bride is English and her family and friends were hilarious. Near the end Rock A. Bye played "Rawhide" and our British guests sang right along in a decidedly Spinal Tap moment.

"Oh yes," the father of the bride said. "The Blues Brothers. We know every word!"

Heading to Springfield to work for Gus this weekend, so we'll take a couple of days off from posting.

Undoubtedly No Doubt

2009-07-09T13:25:00.003-05:00

Went to The Loo last night to see a show, and came away pleasantly surprised.

A friend had a free ticket to see Paramour and No Doubt. Not two of my favorite bands, but with row 30 and center section seats at the Verizon Wireless Amphitheater, I had nothing to lose.

No Doubt was amazing.

I am not a big fan of the band. I hate singer Gwen Stefani's solo girl power pop mush, too.

But I respect the fact they played their own instruments, had tight arrangements and a really cool stage, video and light presentation.

C'mon. If you don't like a sweaty Stefani bouncing around on a stage, you are not a red-blooded American male.

The whole band looked they were having a blast. I've only seen a few performers hold a crowd of 20,000 people in the palm of their hands, and Stefani was one of them.

Got in without delay, left during the last song and beat the crowd out of Earth City, home by 1 a.m.

It was a great night!

She is now an It

2009-07-07T18:43:00.003-05:00

Bella The Destroyer was neutered today at the Quincy Humane Society. For those of you with pets who need this done, call the Humane Society, not your vet — you'll save big bucks.

We will see if she, now an it, calms down after being drawn and quartered and her femaledom removed.

Border Collies are smart breeds, and Bella knew something was up when I took her in this morning. Shey Fey called and was assured she woke up from the surgery and was doing OK.

Bella comes home tomorrow morning. Ahhhhh .... a Bella free day! Lucy loves it, too.

Quote of the day, from our redneck neighbors down the block .... "I already done did dat!"

Bonus Post: Quote Of The Day

2009-07-06T19:58:00.002-05:00

"That's why God made puppies so cute. So you won't kill them. Even though we should."

Full (or no) service

2009-07-06T17:25:00.001-05:00

A friend brought his truck in to get the brakes fixed. The mechanic called him back and told him he needed a new transmission and new fuel filter.

He told them to fix the brakes and leave the other stuff alone. Then he took it to another mechanic, who said the transmission was old but still in good shape, and the fuel filter had nothing wrong with it.

I won't put the name of the dealership that tried to rip my friend off. But I know who it is, and I wouldn't buy a car or get it fixed there in a million years.

Word gets around about lousy service.

Blast On The Fourth

2009-07-05T12:12:00.002-05:00

What a great night at The Elks ... food, fireworks, great crowd to play for.

Jenny Jenny, who can I turn to? Jenny Selvy is an inspiration. God bless you and stay strong!

Great job by TMO on the drums and keyboards. Truly a Spinal Tap moment when we were interrupted in the middle of "Faithfully" by the raffle ticket winners being announced. Gotta give it up to Mark for keeping us on the groove highway (SIX LANES WIDE), Rock A Bye who was getting nasty on slide and Jack for, well, just being Jack, blowing everybody away on the sax once again.

And it was great to have Pat join us for the second half after he did sound on the river for the fireworks. By the way ... might not be a better place in town to watch them than from the Elks parking lot.

The Funions will be on hiatus for awhile at Gus, work and vacations beckon, hopefully back in August with some shows.

No Garage Sales, thanks

2009-07-04T08:13:00.003-05:00

— Sore this morning from mud volleyball in Hannibal Thursday night, and from the Mays Family Picnic and Water Slide of Doom party Tuesday. The water slide is awesome and no wonder it's sponsored by three local chiropractors. You know you are getting old when it takes a couple of days to really be sore ....

— The three-season porch is a perfect place to watch the rain.

— Shey Fey went to a garage sale this morning. Oh, I'm sorry ... an estate sale. Actually can't blame her, because she's looking for a specific advertised item. But sometimes a man, even a big slug like me, has to stick to his guns and just say no.

— Much fun watching the 24th and State fireworks last night. Good company, too. Here's to hoping the rain blows away (that's what the radar shows, anyway) and we have lots of people downtown tonight for fireworks, and at The Funions show at the Elks for our Fireworks Bash.

— Nothing like waking up and going upstairs and realizing Bella The Destroyer has pooped in the hallway. Bella? BELLA!

— The 6-1 senior is no longer a senior, which is strange. In fact, she will soon be a freshman, as in, college freshman. She is back in Q-town after a few weeks up north, unfortunately her summer music trip to Europe didn't happen. It will be nice to have her around because, gulp, she starts college next month. Now THAT is really amazing ....

— I am three weeks away from a two-week Lake Michigan beach and working for Gus vacation. Not sure I will make it ....

— I am hooked on this Facebook stuff. I've managed to keep tabs on my sister's move from Louisville to North Carolina through her kid's Facebooks. Ahhh, 21st century communication.

— Have a safe Fourth, hope to see you tonight downtown!

School Not Bored

2009-07-03T06:29:00.003-05:00

I went and played in the mud Thursday night, and missed all the fun at the school board meetings.

Quite possibly the most riveting online stories The Whig has ever posted .... you just can't make it up.

Click here .... Make sure you read all the related stories.

Elks, Bella The Destroyer

2009-07-02T06:55:00.002-05:00

As mentioned before, one of the best parts about this house is the back porch. Right now I'm trying to wake up and I'm watching Bella, our Border Collie puppy, tear apart a large cardboard box in the backyard.

My mother told a story about me many years ago. I was maybe 2 or 3 years old, we were at Aunt Kay's house, and I was throwing mud against a brick wall in the backyard. My mother and father realized with horror what I was doing, but the legendary Aunt Kay said, "Oh, let him be. He's only having fun!"

So it is with Bella. Sometimes I want to strangle her, until she looks up with those puppy eyes and floppy ears and lopsided grin.

We had a great Funions practice last night with The Mighty One, who purchased a new keyboard. We've added a few songs and at one point last night I was on the drums, TMO was playing harmonica, and we were train-wrecking a blues song into indecipherable and blissful oblivion. Our show Saturday night at the Elks is going to be awesome!

Tonight - mud volleyball. Come see TV guys get their hair messed up.

Emmy, Oscar, whatever

2009-06-30T06:56:00.002-05:00

Why Travis Yates didn't win an Emmy, Oscar, Tony, Bluey, or whatever they give out for low-budget films shot in Washington Park, I have no idea. Click here for more.

Mike Provine's "Cups N Clips" should win some sort of award, as well.

Personal Warming

2009-06-29T13:18:00.003-05:00

From Nigel Tufnel of Spinal Tap fame, when asked about global warming:

"I think it's a personal decision."

More here.

Front Street

2009-06-28T12:50:00.002-05:00

Lots of activity on Front Street last night. Thanks to everybody who came out to see us at Backwaters. Bombshell Translator of Doom even made an appearance!

Before we started I wandered down the street in front of cutters and watched Chris Weinand, Big Jon Walker, Jeff Gire and Danny Mabie play ... I apologize for forgetting the name of the band, but they were freaking amazing. That's four of the best players in Quincy on one stage, Chris might be the best guitar player in town.

Forget it. He is.

The first leg of our World Parking Lot Tour comes to an end this Saturday at The Elks during the fireworks. Mighty one will be joining us and rumor has it bringing his new keyboard, too ...

Water Heaters

2009-06-27T08:39:00.002-05:00

So we've been really lucky with the new house. Everything works great and it's solid as a rock.

Except for the water heater.

It quite working this week. So we track down the former owner, who flipped the house (bought it and fixed it up) and did a great job. Turns out he bought the water heater from some "dude" who used to work for Home Depot. The serial number is ripped off, and turns out the heater "sat in the dude's garage for a few years" before it was installed.

It may not be heating water, but I have a feeling it's plenty hot all by itself.

So ... Shey Fey is all fired up because she gets to make another trip across town, and bring back other stuff she doesn't need.

Also on the home front, HUGE poker game last night with the boys from the office.

Life is good!

Backwaters

2009-06-26T11:46:00.002-05:00

We are playing at Backwaters Saturday night. It will be interesting to see how many people show up.

I am not counting a big crowd. There are tons of events Saturday night in Quincy. Blue Eyed Soul is playing at The Dock, and just down the street from Backwaters, two bands are playing outside by Kutters.

Working in our favor is the heat and the fact it might rain Saturday night, which may drive a few more people inside.

We rely on word of mouth, e-mail and the Net to spread the word about our shows. Sometimes I wonder if it's effective, if we need to advertise more.

In the end, we just show up, play and have a blast, no matter what the crowd is like.

But I will admit - a crowd (big or small) that's into the music is a lot more fun to play for.

So ... come on out Saturday night!

12 strings

2009-06-24T17:19:00.003-05:00

So a while ago, geesh, a year maybe, I borrowed an awesome Martin 12-string from Rock A. Bye and restrung it.

It's been sitting in the case after I played it maybe once or twice, and I need to be hung by the neck until I cheer up for leaving it in there so long.

12-string guitars are awesome and have a rich, full sound. They are also a royal pain in the patootie to tune and keep in tune.

So I dropped it down two steps and that seems to help.

My fingers on the left hand are chewed to shreds after playing for about half an hour, which means I need to play it more often, obviously .... It even has a thin line pickup (no volume control on the guitar) so I can plug it in to play. There are some Funions songs it would sound good on I think.

Since it's too hot to do much outside, I'll try fooling around with it. Rock A. Bye and I have a Two Deadly Weapons gig coming up, maybe we can get it tuned up enough to actually bring it out in public.

Maybe ....

Too Hot

2009-06-23T17:25:00.002-05:00

It's too dang hot to do anything. But I'm good at nothing. So it's all working out.

The air will be on inside Backwaters Saturday night.

Thinking about financial matters makes my head dizzy. It's too hot to sit on the patio and think about it.

So I'll sit under the ceiling fan.

Stormy Show

2009-06-20T08:15:00.003-05:00

Much fun at Turner Hall last night, thanks to the guys (and gal) from Midnight Legend and The Cheeseburgers. Thanks to Mark, Pooh, Big Jon and Rollo for everything. Turner Hall is the best! We'll see if we got any good pics and post them later.

Really bad storm ripped through town about 3:30 yesterday. The power went off at The Whig for the first time I can remember. Click here for more storm coverage.

The above photo was taken of our neighbor across the street, and our area had debris everywhere. At the corner a wire was burning a tree way up high and it took Ameren until the wee hours to get over and take care of it. The fire department even blocked our alley behind the house. This morning Shey Fey and I cleaned up more branches and debris.

The good thing is that nobody was hurt. Some buildings downtown look worse for wear.

Teeth

2009-06-19T11:57:00.002-05:00

From Rev. Tim White at last Sunday's Trinity UCC service ....

An elderly man and his wife are in bed. His wife looks over and says, "You never hold my hand anymore."

The old man slowly creaks his tired body closer to his wife and fumbles for her hand.

His wife looks over and says, "You know what? I miss cuddling with you."

So the man slowly and painfully moves even closer and nestles his head under his wife's neck.

She sighs after a minute and says, "Remember when you used to nibble on my ear?"

There's a pause. And the old man bolts up out of bed, swings his legs over the side and begins walking away.

"Where are you going?" asks the confused wife.

"Why, to get my teeth from the bathroom, of course!" the man replies.

Two New Links

2009-06-18T12:11:00.002-05:00

Added two links to the page. The first is Travis Hoffman's Q-town, and it's really cool, lots of stuff to see and very informative. Travis worked for us at The Whig for a while and I remember him from his awesome acoustic gigs before he moved a way a few years ago.

The second is from a guy named Aaron Baugher. I have no idea who he is, but he puts his name on his site and doesn't hide, unlike most of the Web Warriors around here. Some of his entries are ... different. Studying Latin? Okay .... But I like the site.

Breaking Stuff

2009-06-16T20:33:00.004-05:00

Here's the proof how much fun our last gig was .... the damaged music stand of doom, wrapped in purple duck tape, hopefully ready for Turner Hall Friday night.

Maybe we can break more stuff.

This is going to be one of the best shows and parties of the year, so don't miss it. We are giving away free cheeseburgers AND Funyons to the first 100 lucky fans. Burt Shackelton is even threatening to bring a microwave so you can have hot and tasty cheeseburgers. No pun intended. And Funions are greasy no matter what.